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Courage—this word hasn’t left me since the start of the year. I’ve felt a gap in my ability to tap into it. Let’s face it: courage is a powerful word, and I’d love for it to be one of my core values! But the truth is, it’s not. It doesn’t drive me or embody the essence of my mission. Yet, I recognize that I need a hefty dose of it this year.

The film of my life is playing again, and today, I find myself, yet again, cast in the lead role. It’s a melancholic script we’re following, though perhaps ‘frustrating’ would be a more fitting description. This scene seems to play on a loop, like a record stuck in a groove. I just woke up straight into season 3, episode 6—my favorite! It feels as if it was playing through my dreams. That’s enough, I decide. I’ve exhausted myself.

Re-Enrolling in Intimacy

I didn’t even notice the condescending, slightly negative tone in my statement. It wasn’t significant—it was just a statement, a fleeting breath in the conversation. I didn’t encapsulate anything in it.